Gemini
The horde has stumbled upon a group of campers! Your energy this month allows you to sprint after these living lunches at a great speed. You’ll have a companion keeping up with you, so once you tackle that tasty survivor, take a minute to notice this fellow zombie. They may seem ravenous around you, but that could just be the fresh flesh.
Cancer - Feeling sluggish, you are just shambling in a circle zombie. Be on your toes though, as soon as you spot a survivor you have to be ready to run. For the first rule in “Zombieland” is CARDIO. Once you catch up with that head full of brains, take your time and enjoy your meal but eat with caution!
Leo - Instead of trying to impress the other zombies in the horde this month, just be yourself. You are valued for your love of brains and without effort you will impress them anyway. For instance, that little shack that everyone stumbled upon. Rather than passing it by, you chose to knock down the door, and low and behold there was a group of survivors inside just waiting to be devoured.
Virgo - Once you set your sights on some fresh flesh, do not give up the hunt. Your perseverance will pay off. You will be rewarded with flesh and guts to go around. Don’t gloat about your new found finds though, or you might just find Ash’s “boomstick” knocking you upside the head.
Libra - Usually the loner, step out of your comfort zone and join that passing herd of zombies going your way. Instead of wondering aimlessly alone, you’ll find that gorging with the group is more rewarding. And when you come upon a fenced in town of flesh, you’ll see that there is indeed power in numbers.
Scorpio - Make sure to take the time this month and investigate your surroundings. While you are prone think about just one thing, brains, you might just be missing the bigger picture zombie. Take a minute, keep the groans to a minimum, and you might just find that you are surrounded by traps those sneaky survivors tried to trick you with.
Sagittarius - Calm down zombie! Full of energy and a belly full of brains, your enthusiasm is blinding your awareness of your surroundings. Things may be on the up and up now, but keep in mind that the survivors are getting smarter and they may just be “Coming to get you, zombie!”
Capricorn - Be aggressive this month zombie!! While normally hanging back on the sidelines while the horde does all the work and reaps all the rewards.. get in there and take a bite! You need to grab the bull by the horns and devour this tasty treat for yourself.
Aquarius - After storming into a camp full of zombies, chaos is in charge throughout the horde. Don’t lose your head though! Gorge with caution and once the survivors start to attack back, be on the look-out. You need to know when to shamble with speed away from the situation and you’ll find that you have another day ahead of you ripping through flesh.
Pisces - Don’t rock the boat zombie. The horde you are travelling with may not be perfect but it is more effective than being alone. You are more at risk shambling solo than in the group. Take a moment to notice the groaner next to you. You might just find that their company makes your stomach do flips.. or is that just the metal pole sticking out of it.
Aries - Full of energy this month, you’ll ditch the shambling like a zombie from “Night of the Living Dead” and go full speed like a zombie from “28 Days Later”. Be careful with this new found zip, and remember that the living are not only a yummy meal, but they are hunting you as well. Keep your speed up, senses alert, and you might just find yourself chasing a tasty survivor. Enjoy the meal!
Taurus - This month you are feeling bogged down zombie, like you are pulling a heavy ball and chain. Your energy is low and you can’t seem to get anything but brains off your mind. Shamble onward, keep going and you may just find a tasty torso that has hardly been touched. While frantically feasting, take a look down and you’ll realize your foot was stuck in a trap the entire time.
